Nanny Agency JobsIf something about a child's development concerns you, prepare a private conversation with the parents using what you have actually observed. Explain the concern clearly without presenting a diagnosis, assigning a developmental level or comparing the child with children from another job.
Your contribution is the view you have from ordinary care: what happened, in which situation and what you do not know. The parents can add their observations and bring questions to a qualified healthcare provider. A purposeful conversation gives that information more care than a vague comment dropped into a busy handover.
Decide what you are trying to communicate
Before arranging the conversation, put the concern into a sentence for yourself. Then ask which parts describe an event and which parts are your interpretation. “Something is wrong” does not tell a parent what you have noticed. A long list of impressions may be equally difficult to discuss.
The CDC's Watch Me guidance on conversations with families advises caregivers to avoid diagnostic labels and encourages families to discuss developmental concerns with the child's healthcare provider. The examples below use original wording and do not assess a child's development.
Choose the specific issue that prompted your concern and the observations relevant to it. Do not build a case by gathering unrelated behaviors or searching for a label that makes them fit. The purpose is to share a question responsibly, not to prove a conclusion.
Separate the observation from the interpretation
In this fictional example, Jules’s family is already discussing his participation in activities with his healthcare provider. The parent has asked nanny Imani to share observations from ordinary care. Imani initially writes, “Jules is bad at using his hands,” then recognizes that this is a judgment rather than an account of what happened.
Her direct observations are narrower: “During Monday's drawing activity, Jules asked me to make the marks. On Wednesday, he put the crayon down and asked me to finish the picture.” She also records that she offered to help and what Jules said in response, using his actual words where remembered accurately.
These observations do not establish why Jules responded that way or whether there is a developmental difficulty. Imani has not measured a skill, compared it with an age standard or ruled out other explanations. The drawing requests alone do not establish a concern; Imani is supplying limited observations for the family’s existing question.
If a detail is uncertain, leave it uncertain. Avoid turning “I have not seen this during our activities” into “The child cannot do this.” Record enough context to make the observation understandable without making the note sound like a clinical assessment.
Ask for a private conversation with a clear purpose
Arrange a time when the parent can give the discussion attention and the child is not being discussed in front of other people. Follow any applicable employer or agency process for raising concerns. Do not introduce a sensitive topic through a casual remark to another household worker.
An original opening might be: “I'd like to share something I've noticed during our activities and hear what you're seeing. I have a concern, but I don't know what explains it.” Then describe the specific observations, keeping your tone as straightforward as the words.
Avoid burying the reason for the meeting under so much reassurance that the parent cannot tell you are concerned. Equally, do not make an alarming prediction. You can be clear about wanting professional input while being equally clear that you are not offering a diagnosis.
Make space for the parent's account
Ask what the parent has observed in other settings. Listen without treating a different account as a challenge to your credibility. The child may have experiences and opportunities outside your working hours that you have not seen.
In the fictional conversation, Jules's parent says he often chooses other activities at home. Imani can acknowledge that information and ask whether the parent has noticed anything they want to discuss with the child's provider. She does not decide that the answer either confirms or disproves her concern.
If the parent asks, “What do you think it is?” a useful answer is: “I can't determine that. I can explain what I've observed so you have the details for a conversation with a qualified provider.” Keep speculation about causes, diagnoses or expected future outcomes out of the exchange.
Agree how you can support the next conversation
Encourage the parent to discuss the concern with the child's healthcare provider. Offer a concise factual account they can use, subject to the family's privacy preferences. Do not interpret a screening result, recommend a treatment or make your own assessment the condition for seeking professional advice.
Ask what information the parent would find helpful from ordinary care and how they would like relevant updates shared. If a professional later provides instructions affecting your work, request appropriate explanation and preparation before taking on unfamiliar responsibilities.
Check what each adult understood. Sharing observations does not establish a diagnosis or settle support needs. Avoid promising that an issue will disappear or imposing a waiting period before professional advice.
Sources
CDC: Watch Me, Module 4. Checked 27 October 2026. The fictional observation and conversation are original and are not a developmental assessment.